I’ve wasted the male lead.
It’s true.
This is an indescribable novel, and I was quite apprehensive when I wore in because my name is exactly the same as that female lead, Yunshang.
Will such a thing as wearing a book happen with an oopsy like the same name?
I was hopeful.
But I didn’t expect to wear in not even a few days, I didn’t even feel through the environment of the novice village, my helpful old man to lead back a little boy, young master head and big eyes, white skin and small red lips, cute like a puppy dog.
What kind of bad thoughts can a puppy dog have?
Right.
Unless his name was Lin Jade.
“Good girl, this is Uncle Lin’s son, Lin Jade. He’ll be staying with us for a year. He’s a few months younger than you, so don’t bully him.
Don’t bully him.” “Lin Jade, Lin Jade, Lin Jade, Lin Jade, Lin Jade! This name rings in my ears like a bell.
“Yunshang’s hands and feet are handcuffed to the bed, and there are bells on the ropes, and when she moves, the tiny bells jingle, and usually when she is alone, this sound is evidence that she is alive, but right now, with Lin Jade lying on top of her, this sound has become a racket.
Lin jade eyes tail with red, good looking eyebrows wrinkled, but not worry, but insatiable, he gasped in the ears of Yunshang, calling her sister …… “I stared at Lin jade s eyes, my mind suddenly flashed this fragment, detained and played with that …… puppy dog fart! This is obviously a little pervert who has not grown up! The little pervert is eight years old, and I am also eight years old, and there are still twelve years before he is perverted.
“Dad, I have a headache ……,” I said, resting my chin on the top of my glass of milk and pouting at my old man.
According to the plot, today is my first day of school with the little pervert, we will become the same table, and then all the way to study all the way to the same table, the same table ten years entangled ten years, and finally step on the wrong step, become his “pet”.
This plot, I’m not doing it! Pops gave Lin Jade a slice of ham, then said to me without looking up, “You just can’t have a stomachache! Eat up and go to school.
“Lin Jade’s eyes were watery, she didn’t say a word, and she looked back and forth between me and Pops.
What are you looking at? I wanted to glare at him, but I was afraid that the little pervert had been a bad influence since he was a child and held a grudge, so I just glared at the fried eggs on my plate, rotten eggs! You’re the only one who can do it! Full of yellow! I don’t know how this heroine mixes, spoiled girl daddy does not fit the persona at all, his little motorcycle front carrying the little pervert, the back carrying his own daughter, speed 30 mph, gently urged the little pervert in school to be obedient, what is missing let the teacher call him, there are children bullying him to look for his sister, so that his sister bullied back.
What the hell?
The pro-daughter will end up as a bodyguard?
I was pissed off as a puffer fish until Pops slipped ten dollars into my little pocket.
His big hand patted my little coat pocket, and his kindly admonition was finally my turn, “I’ll give you your allowance to keep, spend it with your brother, don’t lose it.
“For the sake of money, I tugged the little pervert’s sleeve into the classroom, did not dare to bully him privately, suffocated, but perverted corrective program has been put on the agenda, I got close to him and whispered: “A moment later, the teacher came, you tell the teacher that you can not see the blackboard, you have to sit in front of you, know?
“Where do you want to sit?
“The little pervert tilted his head to look at me with an innocent and cute expression.
Aiyo Hey, this little doll …… stop stop stop, almost being confused by human cubs I despise myself in my heart, this is a small yellow text hero! Cute my ass, think of his sinful deeds! I avoided his eyes and spoke with much more confidence.
“I …… I sit by a head, the teacher will arrange it, you don’t care!” I don’t know if you’ve ever met a teacher who is particularly warm-hearted, the kind that is good for you but not as good as you would like.
I have met, I and Lin jade a piece of sitting in the first row.
The teacher stroked Lin Jade’s little head, full of maternal love, “Lin Jade if you don’t know anything ask Yunshang more, Yunshang is our class president.
“Lin jade nodded obediently, and I, I seem to be really starting to have a headache.
The little pervert is twelve years old, I’m twelve years old, and I’m eight years away from perverting him.
I did a lot of small moves, but the direction of the plot remained unchanged, that I have not met uncle Lin transferred from the western border to the southern border, Lin jade brought over anything inconvenient, so he has been staying in my house for the past four years, dividing the few fatherly love of my old man, looking at the two of us to both step into puberty, I changed my strategy.
I thought carefully, this novel setting has a problem, I and Lin jade two people have no mother, so Lin jade for women’s knowledge, can only come from me and the school teacher, growing up on the road is probably the original heroine stepped on the wrong step, so that the Lin jade on her desire to possess, directly perverted into male and female desire.
The clear thinking and clear purpose of me is different, I want to mom, I will mom in the end.
I’m not the same, I want to mom, I will mom in the end.” “Lin jade you English copy good?
I’ve done my math, so I’ll put it right here for you.
“I said, I made a lot of efforts, such as letting Lin jade copy homework, copying papers, playing games, watching TV, so the little pervert’s grades are always hovering in the middle and lower reaches, contrary to the original book’s school bully persona.
He wore nerdy black-rimmed glasses, turned his head to look at me, the action of pressing the game console didn’t stop, he said the words I was expecting, “Too lazy to write, you copy for me.
” Hee hee, “Sure!” I held back my laughter and caged the homework that was curled up in the corner of his book into my arms, continue to play, little thing, this girl is going to read well and fly to the sky.
How do you raise a perverted hero?
Start by destroying his persona.
Elite persona?
Have you ever seen an elite who scored 40 points in English in elementary school?
Perfect persona?
How can you be perfect with ugly glasses?
If Lin jade his father did not come back, I should be able to carry out this destruction plan to the end, but the bad thing is, my uncle Lin, who is only known by his name but not seen by his person, came back, picked up the squatting in the street corner to play video games of Lin jade a beat up, which is good, the degenerate plan is a total failure, Lin jade relying on the hero’s luck, two months, directly in the elementary school graduation exams, pulled down the horse of me as the number one of the ten thousand years.
Mom can’t go on, I want to put on a sack and beat him up! The little pervert is fifteen years old, I am also fifteen years old, and there are still five years to go before he is perverted.
Before the midterm exam, I was so anxious that I had several pimples on my face, red and very scary, so that my father gave me half a month of simmering herbal tea, directly to my aunt to drink.
The girl is older, can not tell everything to the old man, not to mention that I am such a halfway girl, I sneak in my medical record card, go to the hospital gynecology number.
How often do things go against your wishes?
That is, you go to see a gynecologist, you can run into the perverted male master Lin Jade.
After Uncle Lin came back to live in our neighborhood, not far away, before and after the building, open my north-facing window, can see his balcony sun clothes.
He did not blame my father almost raised his son into a small waste, my family extremely good, so I have long known, he recently had a blind date, is a doctor.
Only I didn’t expect it to be a gynecologist, and I didn’t even think that the relationship between Lin Jade and his future stepmother had gotten so good that he, a half-grown boy, would come to the gynecology office to deliver a cake.
“Yunshang, are you sick?
“Lin jade standing in front of the office, tall man in order to bend me a little waist, he rose in recent years aesthetic, ugly glasses abandoned, replaced with a thin-rimmed rims, Sven defeat temperament vaguely began to appear.
He was too close to me, and the smell of laundry detergent on his body, if anything, surrounded me.
The older I get, the more I’m afraid of him, even afraid of hormonal disorders, I want to run away, Lin jade chased after, an excitement well, I feel a hot stream of the bottom of the outward surge.
Well, the doctor did not need to see, postponed twenty days of aunt by Lin jade scared to come.
On the way home, we did not say a word, the bus shook, drove through the streets covered with ginkgo leaves.
Lin jade sat in front of me, I looked at the two spins on top of his head, a little confused, in fact, small perverts are quite normal at the moment.
I don’t seem to have changed anything, but it seems like everything has changed.
Inside the original text, Uncle Lin sacrificed himself the year Lin Jade graduated from elementary school, and there was no such thing as transferring back, so he was officially adopted by my old man that year, and he went from being a temporary foster family to a permanent foster family.
As the days went by, Lin Jade desperately wanted to be a part of this family, and in order to appease him, my father told him that we would always be a family, and that he and Yunshang would never leave Lin Jade.
Plus, the neighbors have been teasing since he was a child son-in-law of the Yun family since he was a child, so Lin Jade has always felt that Yunshang should love and marry him, Yunshang did not comply, and after she resisted, she aroused his possessiveness and dark side …… “We have arrived at the station, what are you thinking about?
“My head was pushed a little, along the direction of the force to see, Lin jade wearing a T-shirt jeans, good appearance to him to add a layer of filters, really …… mom does not go down so annoying ah! “Hey, what are you in a temper?
“The first time I saw the car, I saw the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car, the car.
A break to me broke out a goose bumps, up to seven years of self-hypnosis, let me think Lin jade is still that ungrown perverted little devil.
“Don’t touch me!” Lin jade was startled by me, he collected his laughter and looked at me with a sullen face, his eyes dark.
“Yunshang broke a leg and resisted even more feebly, she couldn’t resist Lin Jade’s invasion, listening to the jumbled ringing of the bells, darkness floated in front of her eyes.
Yunshang felt sick, when she was locked in her room alone, she hoped that Lin Jade would come back earlier so that she could expel the loneliness in clusters, but when Lin Jade came back, she was afraid, she was afraid of his body, afraid of his voice, afraid of his eyes …… “Fragments of the original began to float in my head again, the Lin Jade in front of me and the original Yunshang was afraid of I trembled my voice and apologized to him, “Yes …… I’m sorry ……” I didn’t expect Lin Jade directly waved his hand, full of care to interrupt me, “Forget it, I know that girls have poor temper during the period of great-aunt, don’t bother with you!” I almost want to shed tears, people a good teenager, I have to demonize people, simply shameful.
Small change …… ah no, Lin jade eighteen years old, I am also eighteen years old, this year we participate in the college entrance examination.
I don’t know if I’m raising wasted male protagonist, anyway, eighteen year old Lin Jade is not the same as the one in the book at all.
Uncle Lin remarried to the doctor’s aunt.
The doctor’s aunt is super nice, really Lin jade as a son of love, and even I have felt a few years of mother love.
Lin and I got into the same high school, but not in the same class, he made a lot of friends, the world is no longer only Yunshang.
“You’ve been with Lin Jade since we were childhood sweethearts, and nothing happened to you?
“The same table grabbed me and gossiped.
Yes, Lin jade with good looks and good brains became extremely popular boys in the school, I was naturally this hair little more attention, some girls are embarrassed to send him directly to the things, are entrusted to me to pass, and my table wants to be close to the water tower, three times said that these ambiguous purpose of the words.
I ignored her, ruthlessly nibbled on the apple that I snatched from Lin Jade in the morning, what happened?
I substituted myself as a victim for these many years, full of keeping my distance, I want to mom in the end, what can happen to me?
Lin Jade is sweating on the court, and from my position, I can see very clearly, a three-point air ball, earning a lot of applause.
The apple is so sour, it’s hard to eat.
“I don’t want to go out of the province, I don’t want to go home at the end of the semester and still have to grab a ticket for the Spring Festival.
“After the exam to discuss volunteering, I hugged the Muppet Bear and talked to three parents who laughed without eyes.
Lin Jade and I both did well, well, you could say very well, several school admissions office teachers have contacted my old man and Uncle Lin.
“Che, no ambition, and I, have decided, I want to study in the South University.
“Lin jade crooked in my sofa, he is close to the air conditioning, hands play with the remote control, legs are not honest, flip-flops hanging in the toe wobble, a boy, but dazzling white.
South University in the south city, nearly sixteen hundred kilometers away from our city, high-speed rail nearly twelve hours, the plane also takes four hours.
My hand squeezes the Muppet Bear’s hand, slowly tightening, tightening.
“Why do you want to go so far away?
I don’t even see you a couple times a year. I’d rather be like Yunshang and go to a university in the province, because Ming University is ranked a couple places higher than South University. The doctor’s aunt pushed the old glasses on the bridge of her nose and said cheerfully.
Uncle Lin did not have a stern look in the past, nodded and agreed, “That’s it,……,” my old man’s own daughter is not yet happy enough, completely uninterested in the care of other people’s children, holding a stack of enrollment brochures, flipping back and forth to see.
Lin jade is breaking with his parents about how good the South University, how high-end his favorite aerospace majors, but the words are not finished was interrupted by Uncle Lin, who said …… they were hilarious, all laughing, and I was sitting alone by the window that would be sunburned by the sun.
In the middle of summer, it seems that it is not hot, and even a bit of cold air spread up from the fingertips, I looked at the air conditioner blowing at me.
Oh, so it’s because of you.
Lin jade twenty years old, I am also twenty years old, he went to the southern city to study as desired, and I have a family incident, also did not stay in the province, went to the neighboring province.
I am three hundred kilometers away from home, he is thirteen hundred kilometers away from me, our life and the original has nothing to do with, I even think Lin jade have forgotten me.
Freshman and sophomore years of college these two years, he only took the initiative to contact me thirty-seven times, there are many times are holiday group sending and voting help, only four times he took the initiative to find me again with content, two times to wish me a happy birthday, two times to wish me a happy new year.
I topped his dialog box and scrolled through the words he sent me.
Freshman year when I was in a new environment suffered some frustration, often a large paragraph a large paragraph with him to say that life is not as good as, at first, although he returned to me only a few words, but also can feel his concern.
Then later, my large green square can only get an expression picture, or a sentence to see the perfunctory flavor of the statement.
He should be very busy, I think.
This year’s winter vacation, we all went back home, I was in the Lin family to eat New Year’s Eve dinner, the doctor aunts in accordance with the custom of packaged dumplings eaten at the vigil.
Lin jade does not love to eat these sticky gibberish things, eight soup dumplings scooped five into my bowl, I looked at the bowl of clean eating back up the pile of white rounds, white, fat, lovely love, and poked a hand, the filling inside the trickle out, will be the other are dyed black.
Lin jade winked at me, said wordlessly: sister, help.
Wariness from the back of my head to the tips of my toes, I had to clench my knuckles white in order not to be seen as abnormal.
I had written down on paper verbatim the fragments of the original that I still remembered in my head, and those strokes constructed all the fragrant scenes; before, I saw moral degradation and the sea of lust, but when I looked at it again at this moment, it seemed to me that I saw a thick uneasiness.
Lin Jade and Yunshang grew up close to each other. When they were young, they only had each other, but when they grew up, Yunshang was like a warrior on the battlefield, constantly expanding her world, leaving Lin Jade in their small world, waiting for her to come back with humility and fear.
Unfortunately, after waiting for a long time, she only waited for her to move forward.
Since this is the case, then break the sword of her conquest, pull her back from the vast world, shut in the eyes, only to see his dark room, let her back to only love him, so that he does not have to endure one day, will sit on the Yunshang family seat, to see her future with him completely divided.
Lin jade is afraid of Yunshang no longer want him, like the current I am afraid of Lin jade no longer want me.
After paying his respects to his classmates, he came over to me and said, “Happy Chinese New Year, Yunshang! The sound of firecrackers outside the window and the party chorus inside the house, I returned to him: “Happy Chinese New Year ……” But Lin Jade, I’m not happy, you don’t wish me happy.
When Lin Jade was twenty-one and I was twenty-one, I gave him a bell, gold in color, the size of a fingernail cap, with a clear ringing sound.
The doctor’s aunt added on my behalf, “This is a peace bell, it’s earned by burning the first joss stick, keep it and don’t lose it.
“Lin Jade hung it on her keychain and flashed it in front of my eyes, “Thank you! The distance of our original two-year separation seemed to have disappeared in this instant, and he became the same Lin Jade with her eyes in the clouds again.
There were not many relatives left in the Lin family, but there were many in the doctor’s aunt’s family. Uncle Lin and the doctor’s aunt were busy from the third day of the Chinese New Year to the sixth day of the Chinese New Year, and they were nowhere to be seen.
The good thing is that Lin Jade is the stepson, do not have to follow the door-to-door running, stay at home alone to get free.
But he hates the internet at his house, so he stays at my house all day long playing games.
“How long are you going to stay at my house?
“I rubbed my hair out of the bathroom, looking at the sofa lying on all fours Lin jade asked.
“I’m not leaving, your house has good feng shui, I want to take root here.
“I can see he just won a game, the corner of his mouth curled up.
I do not continue to talk, blow-drying hair and change clothes, then self-centered to go out.
At this time, the busy Lin Jade finally gave up his sight from his screen to give me a ray of light, “Yunshang, what are you doing?
What are you going to do?” “I’m going to buy something.
“What are you buying?
“Fruit. You want to come?”
” I zipped up my boots and extended an invitation to him, then looked at the man on the couch and nodded, standing up and stretching, his sweater shrinking up to reveal a well-defined waist, he was at the age where the line between boy and man blurred, and his hands and feet were a sight to behold.
The doorway of the I like vision was burned generally, hurriedly look down at the floor pattern, it is about the waist of too many fragments, I can not control myself not chaotic thought.
The first month of the year is the day when the warmth of spring is most evident. When we walked to the entrance of the alley, we met a neighboring sister a few years older than us and her child, who looked like two or three years old, and the two of them were reading a picture book while basking in the sun.
“The warrior Cobb promised the king that after three sunsets he would defeat the dragon and rescue the princess.” “He traveled through deserts and forests, and the princess was saved.
“He traveled through the desert and the forest, and with the guidance of the elves, he climbed the mountain where the dragon was.
There was a sunken hole in the peak that seemed to have no bottom, but there was some golden light coming out of it, and Cobb leaned over the hole and looked.
“Guess what Cobb saw?
” The little doll answered in a milky voice, “See the thick (dragon)……” “Yes, see the red evil dragon lying on the pile of gold coins, and is sleeping! There were so many gold coins, and the poor princess was rubbing the gold coins on the edge of the pile, crying as she did so, because the evil dragon said that she couldn’t go to sleep until she finished rubbing the gold coins!” “Pfft ……” Lin Jade suddenly burst out laughing.
I was puzzled: “What are you laughing at?
” “Nothing, this evil dragon is quite clean.
“He was carrying keys and fruits in his hand, and the bells jingled with his movements.
The clean dragon had gold coins and a princess sleeping soundly, while the warrior Cobb drew his longsword in his prying eyes.
Lin Jade was twenty-one, I was twenty-one, and I wished that time had stood still for that year.
Lin Jade has indeed taken root in my house, not only does he hog my couch during the day, but at night he even lays down on my old man’s bed with the covers spread out and huffs and puffs.
Probably the boy’s sleep is good, I knocked on the door for a long time, did not hear any response from the inside, then simply opened the door directly into.
The curtains were not closed tightly, and through the light from the window I could see the rumbling form on the bed, so I walked over in the dark and turned on the small lamp above the bed.
This finally woke up Lin Jade, and he looked at me with a bewildered face.
“Yun …… Yunshang?
” He first woke up, his voice raspy, “What are you doing in the middle of the night?
“I squatted on the side of the bed, still much shorter than him leaning on the bed, I asked him: “Do you want to go back to your home?
I asked him, “Do you want to go back to your house?” “Huh?
I asked him, “Do you want to go back to your house?” “Huh?” “Or, do you want to sleep in my room?
“Lin Jade was completely awake, he sat up on the bed, his eyebrows wrinkled, looking at me like a monster.
The coolness of the floor rose up my bare feet, and not only did my joints ache from the cold, but my head felt like it was about to crack.
Patience was almost exhausted, but I still didn’t want to scare him, so I had to pull an ugly smile and slowly explain with him, “I, I want to sleep here, I miss my dad ……” The incredulity on Lin Jade’s face instantly faded and was replaced with pity and heartache, he often used to look at me with this expression ever since my old man had an accident three years ago.
He rolled over and got out of bed, pushed me into the comforter that still carried his body heat, and his warm palm pressed against my forehead.
“Yunshang, Yunshang?
You seem to be sick, do you need to go to the hospital?
“Lin Jade helped me to tuck the corner of the quilt finely, and did not go away, looking at me worriedly.
This night I do not seem to be me, I am a soul wandering in mid-air, remnants of some sanity, cold eyes look at the bed that I pupils of the black, pulling Lin jade’s sleeve does not let go, “I do not go, I am just afraid, Lin jade I’m afraid of ……,” Lin jade lying beside me, I can see that, the urgency is about to be too big than the worry.
“You don’t like me, do you?
” I lay on my side and looked at him, the corner of my eyes wet and hot against the pillow.
“I don’t.
‘ Lin Jade quickly denied it, but turned his head quickly after glancing at me.
In my line of sight, the teenage boy was stunning, vermillion red spreading from the tips of his ears downwards, the knot in his throat rolling frequently, and pleasured by the sight, I felt my body full of chilled blood gradually warming back up, and drowsiness cascading up.
I heard my own voice, “that’s good …… that’s …… good ……” The next morning I woke up still grasping the sleeve of the Lin jade, only his pajamas are still in my hands, but the person was No sign of him, half of the bed was full of coolness.
I leaned against the head of the bed, looking at the dense text in the memo fell into a deep thought.
Warrior Cobb came to the evil dragon to do what again?
Taking gold coins?
Or to find the princess?
Or, perhaps, to replace the evil dragon?
Lin Jade was twenty-one years old, I was twenty-one years old, a dragon slayer girl, and finally an evil dragon.
I stepped out of my room just in time to see Lin Jade returning with breakfast, her hair spiked and tousled, her eyes green and black.
“Why are you still here?
“I have a sore throat and it’s a little hard to talk.
As soon as the words left his mouth, he saw Lin Jade frowning, he put his breakfast down casually and took a pair of slippers from the shoe rack and walked over.
His voice was also muffled, but he said a lot of things: ”Why do you like to go barefoot so much, your house doesn’t have underfloor heating, isn’t it hard to step on people like this?
Cold comes from the feet!” Probably because the doctor’s aunt has been chanting for years, he has also learned a lot.
The shoes were thrown at my feet, I took two steps back and didn’t look at him, only at the slippers.
I felt my head start to ache again, the corners of my forehead were connected to my teeth, there was no place for comfort, and my mood was so bad that I spoke at him in a questioning tone, “Why don’t you leave?
Why did you come back?
What?
” Ankle was warm palm grip, Lin jade slippers dislike to my feet, I do not move, he looked up, expressionless, voice is also cold, with command, “Lift feet.
“I am still tenacious, but people do not fight, tears flow down dripping to the lapel, printed a mass of dark color.
“Why are you crying?
” Lin Jade, who had forced the shoes on me, stood up, now he was the one who was condescending.
“You know what I meant last night, why did you come back?” “What did you mean last night?
“What did you mean last night?
“”I ……” where I can think of this person this kind of rogue play stupid, angry and speechless, as if a child quarrel, violently pushed him a hand, and then turned to run.
Unfortunately, Lin jade long legs step big, three or two steps will stop in front of me, still in that pretend, “continue to say ah.
” I was too lazy to argue with him anymore, and almost shouted out, “I like you! I like you, I like you so much that I have planned how to get you, I like you so much that I have prepared how to imprison you, I like you so much that I have become the Lin Jade in the book, to get my sweetheart by folding my wings.
Only, I still have a trace of shedding left, so please, my teenager, go …… “Did I say no?
” Lin jade twenty one years old, I twenty one years old, we are both adults, know what we are doing.
Lin Jade embraced me, his heartbeat in my ear, steady, strong.
“I don’t know if I like you or not, but Yunshang, when you said you liked me, I was so happy, this is the kind of happiness I’ve never felt before when someone confessed to me.
” “I didn’t sleep a wink last night, I kept wondering if I was pitying you.
” My spine visibly stiffened for a few moments at his words, and in return he gave me a soothing pat, he paused and continued, “But the answer is no, I would have been much happier if Uncle Yun was still around, and you had come to me when you were scared.
” “Are you not mistaken?
You probably just feel happy to be needed by a good friend.
“I’ve calmed down and my sanity has returned, so even though my heart is full of spring flowers, it doesn’t stop me from baring him.
Lin Jade didn’t answer, lifting my face to meet my eyes with a smile on his brow, like a big golden hair raised by a granny in the neighborhood, and after my hot breath covered my whole face, he teased me, “What about you?
You’re not mistaken?
You’re probably just a little possessive and emotionally misinformed about your neighbor’s brother.
” “What do you know!” I pushed him away in exasperation, then backpedaled back, pulling on his collar to make him bow his head, correcting, “And, I’m older than you.
“Uh, sis.”
“He recognized quickly, came to my ear and called me, his voice was sheepish, without the taste of deliberate seduction.
I hid in the restroom for a long time and didn’t go out. Later, I heard him ask me outside, “Sister, breakfast is cold, do you want me to buy it again or I’ll cook it for you?
I’ve been fed with hormones,” he said, “but I’m not sure if I’m going to be able to do that.
Lin Jade Extra – When we are facing separation, things will go against our wishes.
The day of Uncle Yun’s accident was the penultimate day of our college entrance examination.
I remember clearly, that day the day dawn, Yunshang came to my father, people shaking into a sieve general, the police call to repeat the call.
Seeing bravery, resuscitation failed.
How scenic the first word was, and how despairing the second.
Later we went to the hospital, and saw the light-hearted one, a girl, the same age as us, being pressed by her parents to kneel in front of Yunshang.
Yunshang cried mute voice, so when she tried her best to vocalize, it seemed as if every word carried blood, “You tell me, why did you jump?
Why?
Why did you kill my father?
Why did you kill my father? The question was sharp and irrational, the girl was crying, her parents shielding the front, weighing Yunshang like a desperate warrior, holding a halberd, no shield, all wounds nakedly exposed.
I never knew that the word pity could be so figurative, so figurative that at this point in time Yunshang no matter what you say to her, it is all wrong, it is all words without the suffering of others.
“Yunshang, we …… we go to accompany Uncle Yun …… I accompany you ……” I do not want to let Yunshang face such a scene again, hand around her shoulders, half dragged and half assisted to bring her away from the I’m not going to let Yunshang face such a scene again.
It is also at this moment that I realized that growing up together she is much smaller than me and much more tender.
It is a pity that this kind of weak girl has lost the person who will stand in front of her forever.
I said to my dad, I want to change my volunteer, I want to accompany Yunshang to the provincial university.
My dad didn’t say anything, Auntie asked a little hesitantly, “You …… A jade, Auntie doesn’t mean anything else, it’s just that, A jade, are you and Yunshang in love?
” I paused, in love?
Naturally, no.
I don’t even know whether I like Yunshang or not, I only know that I want to protect her now, so that when she is sad, there is someone in front of her to block.
I didn’t admit it, so my dad and aunt didn’t agree with me to change my volunteer this, but the volunteer application is online, I can not discuss with them.
I logged on to Yunshang’s account, the first volunteer to the fifth volunteer, I and her, no difference.
That night, I sat alone in the park where I played games as a child until very late, I felt that I was a righteous warrior, giving up everything to accompany Yunshang to break into an unknown future.
Only at that time, how could I have known that what I had struggled for so long to deliver to her was what she didn’t want.
If I’m smart and alert enough, I should go to confirm the filling information before the end of the volunteer registration, after all, I know Yunshang’s password, she naturally also know my.
Unfortunately, at that time I was full of self-sacrifice and self-touching, so nervous that I did not even dare to go to see Yunshang.
Until 17:30 on June 27, the volunteer application is over and the dust has settled.
I went to Yunshang’s house to look for her, the door was not closed, the lights were not turned on, the dusk was still lingering, Yunshang sat under the window on the east side of the house smoking, and when she smelled and looked at me, the smoke lingered around her body, like an evil spirit reborn.
Have you ever been afraid?
Fear of those close to you.
I have, I’m sorry Yunshang, I just want to turn around and run away at that moment, I think she’s like a swamp that will make people topless, close to it all will be doomed.
“Jade Lin, I’m not going to the provincial university.” I hesitantly stepped back from the doorway.
“My hesitant steps backward at the door were stopped by her words.
“What do you mean?
‘ Yunshang’s elbows were against her knees, her face resting in her hands, the red cigarette butt right in the corner of her eye, and she could hurt herself if she wasn’t careful.
She repeated softly, “I’m not going to the provincial university.
” “You go to the South Side in peace.
” she added as she took a drag on her cigarette.
South City, my ass! I gave up everything to be with you! Is this how you treat me?
A word of peace of mind?
I walked over to Yunshang and ripped her up, the cigarette was thrown to the ground and stomped hard.
I was really angry, so angry that my mind was blinded, I do not know where to start the accusation, at this time of Yunshang first out of the voice, “your volunteer I help you change back,” she is the tone of education, “you do not do this again, the future is your own, there is no need to because of impulse to lose all the money.
“You can’t afford the consequences, and I don’t want to,” she said.
“I’ve been told by her in a few words that my heart is aching, my struggle, my reluctance, my righteousness, in the case of Yunshang, it is immaturity, it is irrational, it is impulsive.
People do things on impulse, from the heart?
I do not know, anyway, I kissed her, or bite?
When we parted, Yunshang’s lips were broken, and the tip of my tongue still had a fishy sweetness.
She looked at me, full of fear, like the kind she would occasionally show as a child, as if it were etched in her soul.
I fell away.
That summer, we walked on different paths, and could not see the hope of reunion.
Yunshang went to a second-best institution, one she could have gotten into a top-heavy college with her grades.
Whether it was the school teachers or my dad and aunt, or me, no one knew what Yunshang was up to.
She didn’t give us a chance to ask either, she disappeared, disappeared after dealing with Uncle Yun’s funeral, they couldn’t contact her, and I, never contacted her, I didn’t dare.
If from the mouth of Yunshang said never see again, I think I will go crazy, crazy to …… want to make her never say such words again.
Eighteen-year-old me, thought that we will always be silent between us, silent until the distance will be my dark thoughts fade away, silent until the time to make me can accept our complete separation.
But this realization only lasted until the second before Yunshang took the initiative to come to me.
She came back in late August, when the summer had come to an end, wearing a nice dress and standing under the streetlight at the entrance to the alley, smiling and teasing the dog with her toes.
“Lin Jade!” She ran over to me, looking up at me with her usual expression, her eyes so open that I didn’t dare to look directly at them.
“Well, you’re back.
“We walked along the alley, past the front door of our house, past the small park, back to the entrance of the alley, and then down to the bottom of the flat.
We talked a lot, but not a word about volunteering, or about that twilight.
The words “yunshang” and “hmm?
“The words rolled around on my tongue for a long time, but they still didn’t reach her ears.
“It’s okay, go to bed early.
“Good night.”
“This was the last time we saw each other at the age of eighteen, familiar yet strange, familiar yet distant.
I knew the reason for Yunshang’s change of volunteerism two months after we parted.
At that time, the autumn in the southern city was not yet obvious, but the nights in S city could no longer be felt as hot and dry.
I had traveled over a thousand kilometers to find Yunshang, and had rehearsed many times in my head, but the first thing I said when I saw her was a question, “Yunshang, what on earth are you doing?
” Yunshang’s expression changed from the delight of first meeting to dismay, with a hint of embarrassment and embarrassment; we knew each other too well, so she immediately knew what I was angry about.
Eighteen year old me was impulsive and self-righteous, I didn’t pay attention to that moment of elation, I only cared about the trace of embarrassment, and even felt betrayal.
How ridiculous, with a relationship like ours, I actually still knew the truth about her in college through a classmate.
Yunshang lied to me, in her mouth, in the new environment of bad luck is never good cafeteria and never get a seat in the library, but the actual?
Stealing someone’s boyfriend and driving someone’s ex-girlfriend to the point of almost jumping off a building.
I’ve been so hard since I found out about this that my back teeth ache, and I hate that I can’t just ball her up into a tiny little ball and shove her inside me and empathize with me.
How can she be like this?
How good is that person?
It’s worth her taking the blame to get it.
Yunshang looked at me for a moment, then lowered her eyelashes and pulled up a smile, saying lightly, “That’s Xu Yayan’s boyfriend.
“After that, she stopped looking at me and looked toward the disappearing sky.
I don’t know whether it was the darkness of the sky or an illusion on my part, but at that moment I felt that the light in her eyes had gone out, like the sinking sun, and the darkness of the night was coming up endlessly.
Xu Yayan, the girl that Uncle Yun saved in June.
Yunshang’s eyelashes fluttered slowly, and the breath I had been holding for hours was suddenly pierced through the small opening at the tip of that black raven eyelash, leaking cleanly.
If I were a few years from now, I would have hugged her, as I really wanted to do in my heart, and told her that no matter what, there was still me, so don’t punish someone else’s faults with your own, it’s just not worth it.
But at the moment, I tried to suppress that inexplicable bit of celebration, my mouth needlessly occupying the moral high ground, saying what I thought, “Even if it’s her boyfriend, is it right for you to do so Yunshang?
Can you be normal and rational ……” “No!” Probably stimulated by my words, Yunshang’s eyes were red, her fingers were cold but strong, breaking my fingers that were holding her wrist one by one, her voice was a little crazy, “I’m not normal?
What qualifications do you have to think I’m not normal?
!” “I’m not ……” I regretted it.
“The one who died was my father!” 「Didn’t she feel desperate about not being able to go to college together?
What about breaking up?
Shouldn’t she die after that?
If she can’t die once, she should die twice!” In the end, the words became a curse.
My throat stuttered, a feeling of powerlessness spread throughout my body, and I realized that I wanted to embrace her, but I lost my qualifications and position.
“But ……” “Lin Jade, I have to kill her!” Yunshang did not give me a chance to speak, turned her head and walked into the night, her back was determined.
I have no words to persuade, in this farce, Xu Yayan is indeed the culprit.
She was looking for the cause of death in the eyes of the onlookers is simply incredible – repeat or not get into the boyfriend in the university, so want to use death to threaten the parents to go to the relationship.
It’s just bad luck that she made it look real, instead of harming Uncle Yun.
She ruined a girl who could have been standing in the clouds picking stars.
Yunshang changed her volunteerism because she wanted to punish Xu Yayan herself.
This cause and effect of a connection, I feel more and more I myself is ridiculous, this wrong, who are reasonable, only the side advice is unreasonable, now well, I am the unreasonable side, I not only want to persuade Yunshang, I also scolded her.
The night dew thickens, the wind has a few repressed sobbing, I listen to hallucinations in general.
Yunshang was walking fast, and within a few minutes, she reached the dormitory, and I called out to her before she entered the main door.
“I’m sorry,” she said, “I’m sorry.
” She paused in her steps, didn’t turn around, and softly said, “Lin jade, you go back, go back today, I’ll pretend you never came.
” I didn’t listen to her, I didn’t go, I stayed in s city for two days, wearing a mask and a hat, sneaking around and following Yunshang for two days.
She did take me as never having been there, and sent me a message with me the next day saying that the master of the six canteens was by and large from Jiangnan, and that the fried shredded potatoes all had a sweet flavor.
This row of two lines of green squares, is she at the river to eat sandwiches when she sent me, she said that the teacher of applied technology with an accent, the class is very difficult to listen to, this is she in the library after a day to send me.
My fingers stayed on the keyboard for a long time but I didn’t press a single word, I didn’t know what the point of her being so self-defeating was, I didn’t want to let it go but I didn’t know how to help, and at the end of the day, I replied back.
“I’m glad you’re okay.
” She whitewashed the peace, I perfunctory acting.
Just that last weekend of every month, I had a fixed schedule, to go to s city to be a stalker, sneak to watch that poor acting actor weave not clever lies.
Lin jade extra three Yunshang finally did not continue to entangle with the man, because Xu Yayan does not need Yunshang’s punishment, her parents business was reported to be thoroughly investigated, she did not know is unable to accept the family change or what, in the middle of the night jumped in the river, this time luck, no one to save her, go along with her wishes, three or four days before being fished up.
This news in the local news accounted for a large page, I read carefully after pointing off, after a while remembered to the day, to Yunshang sent a wish you happy Tanabata.
She returned to me after a long time, very cold a few words, you are also happy.
I’m happy if you’re happy.
The days go by fast, we are engaged in things are written on the face of the child into a full double ten adults, small town has small town saying, after twenty years old will no longer be called a child, because this is the beginning of the real burden of their own life.
In the sophomore winter vacation before, the previous year did not come back to New Year’s Yunshang received a message from my aunt, after all, received a few years of love, she could not refuse the elders of the begging.
I looked at the screenshot sent to me by my aunt, and exhaled a long breath, it’s so good, we’re finally going back.
I had thought that seducing Yunshang should not be difficult, after all, I am still somewhat confident in myself, but I did not expect that things would go this way.
The book in his hand is very thick, not much used, and only a few lines are written every few pages, the font is beautiful, and the content …… well …… is quite wonderful.
“What are you doing?
” More than a year without cleaning the house is full of dust, Yunshang cleaned most of the day, forehead rose a layer of fine beads of sweat, perhaps dissatisfied with my standing laziness, wrinkled eyebrows to see me.
I didn’t move and stuffed the book in my hand back to its original place, pointed to the two boxes of miscellaneous things by the door and answered her: “Here, it’s all straightened out, you can call someone to take it away later.
“She was distracted, and went back to putting together the things that were not to be disposed of and discarded, busy as the dust in the air, not stopping for a moment.
“Sister.
” I called out inquisitively, and saw Yunshang’s expression become adorable, the kind of look that makes you want to run away, but try to hold it back, and pretend that there’s nothing wrong at all.
I laughed in my heart, calling her a poor actress is high praise, she clearly hasn’t even touched the threshold of an actress.
Twenty-one years old, we have to start planning for our own life.
I believe that Yunshang’s first pillar of incense was indeed sincerely begged for me, because everything went too smoothly to be true.
The ceiling was divided into several pieces by the light outside, bright and dark.
It was the first day of the new moon, but I was like being in a furnace, and she tugged on my sleeve and slept through it, probably tired from crying before bed, her breathing a little heavy, but real.
Her presence, her need, truly within my reach.
I stayed up all night, the cubs in their cages, the hunters already adhering to full patience.
